I'm using SM build 8454 (but I've noticed this earlier) as only Incoming Gateways and all of them (3) use: 11GB, 10GB and 20GB or RAM.
Spool levels are at level about 1400, 1400 and 400 messages in Waiting to deliver sections so this are not a big numbers I think. I use incoming gateways only for SPAM filtering (rspamd and other built in functions) and I don't use ClamAV on them. Also I can't update to later builds since SPAM headers being added by latest build are encoded which is being decoded on destination server but I don't want to update main server yet.
RAM usage which I provided at the beggining is from task manager and here you have stats from SM dashboards of Incoming Gateways
EDIT: I don't use AD and systems are virtualised on VMWare and higher memory usage I've noticed when I started using preview versions of latest SM release since I wanted to integrated rspamd solution for spam checking.
EDIT2: Memory usage is something which returns after some time of service uptime. It returns after system restart or service restart after some period of time so this is not something which occured one time.